You Are So Cruel

    We have same taste, we both love to talk about love. And what kind of love that we like? Yes, a melancholy one, full of sadness and desperation but still can make us happy. No, maybe I’m wrong. Do you think that thing absolutely make us happy precisely? That ‘only thing’. The only thing that make us happy to talk about love is sadness and desperation itself. Or am I wrong again?

 This is getting harder, more complicated than before. I resemble you, a person who lonely but happy to keep imagining what world can be in fantasy, where no one can ever lay their hands on the story. We both know that’s all we have and that’s all we ever wanted in this life. Freedom to live in our own mind which may never be real but can give us the most real feelings. And now, look what you have done! You shot them all in pieces! You ruined my universe! The only one I have!

   See, if you don’t love me just say it bluntly! In front of my face, in reality. Don’t ever make me uncertain again of anything about you nor about our strange relationship in my heaven of illusion. Did you know, I’ve always been wondering about how two people in this real world, who have same likes and dislikes, both are truly stranger too, but magically understand without a doubt though never seeing each other? I believe that can happen. Certainly!

   I had believed that man was you. I had believed that you have read my words. I had believed that she was me, a special girl that you’ve been writing about all the time. Did you ever wonder how afraid I am to deal with my own faith? To against my own faith? Did you ever care? Nope!

   All I want is make this story to have a happy ending. Unfortunately, I don’t have a heroic character to make it happen, even in my own dreams. Once again, I’m just a dreamer. That’s mean I need so much sleep now. Ah, maybe you too?

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